So, my flight was supposed to arrive at 10:20pm in SLC on Thursday the 6th.

Instead, my flight arrived at 12:35pm on Friday the 7th. Why? Because my first flight, the one right out of Manchester, was delayed for 4.5 hours because they couldn’t get the plane STARTED. We spent 3 of those hours on the plane as they went through four external starters (finally borrowing the fourth from Delta and starting the airplane) and 3 de-icings. The third took awhile because the de-icer-man had wandered off to another assignment and we had to wait for him to get back.

The captain said 10 minutes. It took 30.

We arrive at O’Hare 4.5 hours late and we’ve all missed our connections (it’s now 11:30 pm O’Hare time). They put us up in the Regency Hyatt, a wonderful hotel.

But without my luggage. I was so hungry, I was contemplating gnawing my own arm off. Instead, the hotel had a menu for a takeout place that delivered food until 5am (it was now 2am). They brought me fries and a roast beef sandwich, both of which were the best I’d ever eaten. Not that I really tasted them.

First flight out of O’Hare to SLC is at 10 am. I pay $3 for a bottle of Diet Mtn Dew at the hotel. Then I take my dry face (never found that moisturizer) back to O’Hare on the shuttle.

Uneventful flight. Arrive in SLC at 12:35 SLC time. Nathan is there to pick me up. Yeay! We head down to fetch my luggage.

They say it was last scanned at O’Hare.

…

And that it’s still at O’Hare.

…

Nathan suggests checking the baggage carousel anyway. There’s my bag!

We head to the hotel. Hotel has lost half my reservation because despite having Nathan call last night and tell them I’d be in today, they’d cancelled my reservation for not showing up the night before. I re-arrange a standard room. We find rivka. We head out to the government center. We find the marriage license place.

Nathan reaches into his pocket.

Pulls out an empty wallet. Money. Random cards. Bits of paper.

No license.

Nathan has lost his driver’s license. We zoom up to his parents house where a search commences. Nathan’s brother Zack nearly falls headfirst out of the van door trying to get the Shih tzu out of the van. No license. Nathan calls the marriage license office. They need a photo ID with proof o f birth. Nathan has a food handler’s permit and his birth certificate. Nathan finally starts to breathe again on the drive back and the moment he does, the person in the right lane decides to change lanes without checking their blind spot, sending Nathan’s car shifting left and into someone else’s blind spot and there was nearly a Very Big Accident. *Note, he did not have his driver’s license. He swore. I was proud.

There wasn’t. We went back. They took his ID. We got the license. In the meantime, my sister called at least five times from her layover in Las Vegas to tell me mundane information such as: My flight number changed. They’re boarding us 10 minutes late. We’re still arriving on time…etc.

We drop of rivka at the hotel. We take a nap. My sister arrives and calls asking for a mofoing ride to the hotel.

My sister swears a lot.

We find her in “EFFING COLD UTAH” outside the airport load/unload.

I still haven’t eaten at that point. My arm is again in danger of being gnawed off. We go to dinner at this place called The Pie. It was Damn Good. Arm is saved once again. Back at the hotel, Nathan, me, Aubrey and rivka play chrononauts (Seriously Cool Game). My Murderous Headache appears. I go to bed. Sarah arrives. My sister and I are sharing a bed (we haven’t done that since we were six and ten and I ended up popping her one in the lip). Sarah nicely pressed the clothes since we couldn’t get them pressed by the hotel because of my late-ass flight. As Sarah irons, we all talk. Sarah tells us that Aubrey and I fall asleep at Exactly The Same Time.

Leaving her alone to iron.

Next morning. I’m roused to get ready for breakfast at IHOP.

mmmmmmmmmm. I. Love. IHOP.

That said. We have breakfast. Get back to hotel. Go back and forth between hotel and Nathan’s house. Nathan forgets shoes and socks and belt. Nathan is lucky his head is attached to his body by his neck or he’d have lost it by now.

We go and get married!

*dies*

Exerpt:

HANDS CEREMONY
Nathan and Jamie please face each other and hold hands, palms up, so you may see the gift that you are to one another.

These are the hands of your best friend, young and vibrant with love that are holding yours on your wedding day as you pledge to love and cherish each other today, tomorrow, and always.

These are the hands that will work with yours as you build your future, as you build your dreams, as you laugh and cry through life together.

These are the hands that will comfort you in illness, console from grief, and hold you tight, giving strength and courage during struggles in difficult times.

These are the hands that will countless times wipe tears of joy, and of sorrow, from your eyes

These are the hands that will hold each child in tender love, soothing them through illness and hurt, supporting and encouraging them from their first breath.

These are the hands that will help you hold your family as one.

These are the hands that will love you and cherish you through the years, and like no other, will comfort you with even the lightest touch.

May these four hand always hold one another as you build your life together. Give them strength to hold on during the storms of life. Keep them tender and gentle as they nurture each other in love. Help these hands to keep building a relationship brimming in caring, trust, and love. May these hands be your strength, your shield, your shelter, and your guide.

…

Addendum:

Nathan finds his license in a random pile of random papers on his bathroom counter on Sunday night.

Don’t ask.

…

weekend wedding pics

Categories: philosophical